Mom used to call my dad the Pied Piper. When he showed up in the yard, kids began appearing like magic.
If he had chores to do, he cracked jokes and talked to us while we worked along side him. If he had time for a break, he played with us. Outdoors it was basketball, baseball, touch football, badminton, sledding, snowball fights or wrestling. Indoors it was table tennis, card games, board games or musical jam sessions.
Although Dad was our favorite playmate, he never confused being a father with being a pal. He was the authority, holding us to a high standard of behavior. When we misbehaved, the fun ended. A one-sentence rebuke from Dad seemed worse to us than a spanking.
Dad tried to include us in whatever he loved in life. He loved music, so when we were driving in the car, he taught us songs and sang with us. He loved God, so he told us Bible stories and brought us with him and Mom to church. He loved learning, so he took us to museums and exhibits. He loved sports, so he took us to see games and played sports with us, helping us work on skills like batting and shooting baskets.
Although Dad could be fiercely competitive when playing with adults, when he played with children, the challenge for him changed from winning to figuring out the best way to teach the game.
He was a genius at adjusting rules to games so each child could learn to play well at his or her level of development. We used to play touch football games that included everybody who wanted to play, from my teen-age brother and his friends to our 3-year-old brother Lee.
To entice the teens to play touch football with a baby on their side, Dad decreed that any time Lee’s team managed to get the ball into his hands, Lee got an automatic touchdown. That rule transformed Lee from a team nuisance to a team asset, and it motivated his team to encourage him. As Lee’s skills improved, Dad kept adjusting the rules to keep the game a challenge for him and fun for everyone else, too.
Looking back, I wonder how Dad spent so much time with the six of us kids. He worked with Grandpa in a family construction business — far more than a 40-hour-a-week job. And he was active in church and community organizations.
Dad made a conscious effort to spend his recreational time with his children. That choice paid off in the warm relationships he maintains with them today.
Worth repeating: The Bible says, “As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust” (Psalm 103:13-14 NIV).
Today’s prayer: “Thank You for having compassion on me like a good father with his children. Help me to experience that compassion today. Amen.”
